A Piece of Paper

Saving for retirement, something I am all for and do actually stress about (ridiculous, I know) and saving in general is something that I am all about. Budgeting is my best friend, and I saved quite the pretty penny during my four years as an undergrad while still enjoying things I like such as good food, outings, and lots of shopping. However, now that all the fun of college is over and I've been thrown into the "real world" and spend 8 hours a day sitting at my desk in a corporate office, I've had a lot of time to think about life. In the past, I always thought I would be happy with a job and a roof over my head, and don't get me wrong I am I just need something MORE. So what does a girl do? Buys a spontaneous plane ticket to New York City for one weekend, and another to Boston a few weeks later.

As has been send in past posts, I tend to think too much about the future and not living enough in the present. I decided that as long as I can afford it (between two jobs), I am able, young, single, yeah I think its time to add some adventure into my life. My average weekends are spent in an OCD coma waking up early, being productive, and feeling like I'm missing out from being off which is crazy. So from here forth I will follow my heart, and listen to my head. Who knows what this means, last year it led to adopting a kitten, this year taking some trips, next year.... moving? I am thinking so.

Saving and budgeting is VITAL to living a life where you are not chained to a job you don't love, living in a place you don't like, and feeling like you have to wait until retirement to take the trips you dream of. Save for the future, but still live in the present. Take that trip, move to a new and scary city, you never know until you try it if it is right for you and you will never regret not taking the plunge and trying.

In peace.

    Kelsey.

"The purpose of our lives is to be happy." -The Dalai Lama

A Piece of Time

Thinking, over-thinking, planning, counting down the days. We all do it, some of us more obsessively than others. I am an extremely obsessive and compulsive person. When I get an idea in my head its all I can focus on, think about, and I do everything in my power to achieve it. Don't get me wrong its a fantastic trait to have in some aspects; when I want a new job I GET ONE. When I decide to run a half-marathon I do it. Sometimes however, its a little too much to handle. I am an overly driven girl, I am terrified of failure, backsliding, not accomplishing my dreams. Throughout my life I have always had a set in stone goal I knew I needed to achieve like graduating high school, college, etc. Now that I am an alumni and working in my first career/ full-time professional role I am lost and terrified as sad as it is to say. Some people would be exstatic, fulfilled, comfortable; yet I am nervous, anxious, and unsettled.

My sweet mother would describe me as overly compulsive. However, its just the dreamer in me and the drive I have burning in my belly to always achieve greater things. In life, I am pleased and settled. I enjoy everything I do, I am easily happy. When the sun rises I am over joyed to see the vibrant colors, on my runs I observe the chirps of the birds and the green of the grass, the lush velvety fur of my kitty cat Charlie. But yes, I am usually not completely settled in the fact that I do spend much time looking forward to see what else this world has to offer me, and more importantly what I have to offer it.

This kind of lifestlye does not always allow for complete inner peace, which is something I am more actively trying to achieve. Currently I am striving to allow myself to be completely present which is a huge challenge for any human being. If you were to ask an animal what time it is or what they are doing, they would simply say now. They do not have the brain function to plan far ahead into the future or dwell on the past which is the downfall of human kind. Imagine living in the moment always, which is how we should all strive to live. The future no matter how well planned and put together will never be certain, and the past is over and cannot be tweaked.

My goals for myself and you as well: Enjoy life in the moment. Put down your cell phone, you only have this moment to live and enjoy and are not promised any more. Don't plan too far ahead, you will lose your present time. Splurge, be spontaneous, take that random trip; for who knows what may block you from it in the future. Use every moment of your time to grow and learn.

 

“When life becomes too complicated and we feel overwhelmed, it’s often useful just to stand back and remind ourselves of our overall purpose, our overall goal. When faced with a feeling of stagnation and confusion, it may be helpful to take an hour, an afternoon, or even several days to simply reflect on what it is that will truly bring us happiness, and then reset our priorities on the basis of that. This can put our life back in proper context, allow a fresh perspective, and enable us to see which direction to take.” 

-Dalai Lama: The Art of Happiness

A Piece of Yourself

Your body. Basically the only thing in your life that you truly own completely; it has been yours and only yours since birth, and will be the only thing you take with yourself throughout your journey in this life. It makes sense then, that its the thing many of us think about and obsess about more than anything else, including relationships, work, and dreams.

I like most other women, have obsessed about my body as long as I can remember and it clogs my mind for most of my waking hours.

Wake up: Breakfast. Think about what is nutritious, healthy, won't make me fat/gain weight/bloated
Get dressed: What fits my body, what looks good on me, what is in style, what will other people like to see.
Lunch: continuation of breakfast
Seeing co-workers: wow she looks great, I wish I could look like that. That's it, I'm not eating.

This is a vicious and RIDICULOUS cycle we are trapped in, yes, trapped. Its not easy to escape. Modern society is largely based on aesthetics. Our cars, our homes, advertising, our clothes, even our food and our pets. Rather than what is pleasing to the soul or to the mind, we choose what is pleasing to the eye. This has created a society based largely on fitting a certain "image." Today, for the most part that image is driven by models and celebrities and whatever advertising has decided to feed us for the time being. Women, are now seeing those images and get the idea into their head that it is the only and best way to look and begin to obsess. This leads us to shopping malls, hair dressers, the gym, certain grocers and restaurants. We skip meals, work our asses off at the gym, spend money we don't have to achieve this "image" that is actually completely unachievable. More women that ever are in hospitals and recovery centers for eating disorders (I have battled one myself) and bloggers are beginning to come out and erase their perfect foodie/athletic images (thank you Jordan Younger!) to tell us that this image isn't achievable, none the less healthy! What is healthy, is to be yourself and be your best.

Size is more than the number of your jeans, the style of your hair, how perfectly polished your nails are. Its about what is in your head, and your heart and how you achieve THOSE DREAMS. The image we should be trying to reach is that of peace and happiness, inner peace. Peace so when you lay your head down at night, you know you have done all you can and you are content.

How do you achieve this, you ask? Eat to nourish and fuel your dreams, write down your dreams and how you are going to achieve them, be all of yourself (no matter who that is!), do everything you can to achieve your dreams, never try to please anyone but yourself. In the end, that person who lives in your body and is on a little journey in it called life, is the only person who's ideas about it matter when you look yourself in the eye. So stop worrying about achieving a silly image that someone at a desk decided was going to matter, and matter to yourself.



In peace,

    Kelsey.

“So let us reflect on what is truly of value in life, what gives meaning to our lives, and set our priorities on the basis of that. The purpose of our life needs to be positive. We weren't born with the purpose of causing trouble, harming others. For our life to be of value, I think we must develop basic good human qualities-warmth, kindness, compassion. Then our life becomes meaningful and more peaceful-happier.”
― Dalai Lama XIV, The Art of Happiness