A Piece of Time

Thinking, over-thinking, planning, counting down the days. We all do it, some of us more obsessively than others. I am an extremely obsessive and compulsive person. When I get an idea in my head its all I can focus on, think about, and I do everything in my power to achieve it. Don't get me wrong its a fantastic trait to have in some aspects; when I want a new job I GET ONE. When I decide to run a half-marathon I do it. Sometimes however, its a little too much to handle. I am an overly driven girl, I am terrified of failure, backsliding, not accomplishing my dreams. Throughout my life I have always had a set in stone goal I knew I needed to achieve like graduating high school, college, etc. Now that I am an alumni and working in my first career/ full-time professional role I am lost and terrified as sad as it is to say. Some people would be exstatic, fulfilled, comfortable; yet I am nervous, anxious, and unsettled.

My sweet mother would describe me as overly compulsive. However, its just the dreamer in me and the drive I have burning in my belly to always achieve greater things. In life, I am pleased and settled. I enjoy everything I do, I am easily happy. When the sun rises I am over joyed to see the vibrant colors, on my runs I observe the chirps of the birds and the green of the grass, the lush velvety fur of my kitty cat Charlie. But yes, I am usually not completely settled in the fact that I do spend much time looking forward to see what else this world has to offer me, and more importantly what I have to offer it.

This kind of lifestlye does not always allow for complete inner peace, which is something I am more actively trying to achieve. Currently I am striving to allow myself to be completely present which is a huge challenge for any human being. If you were to ask an animal what time it is or what they are doing, they would simply say now. They do not have the brain function to plan far ahead into the future or dwell on the past which is the downfall of human kind. Imagine living in the moment always, which is how we should all strive to live. The future no matter how well planned and put together will never be certain, and the past is over and cannot be tweaked.

My goals for myself and you as well: Enjoy life in the moment. Put down your cell phone, you only have this moment to live and enjoy and are not promised any more. Don't plan too far ahead, you will lose your present time. Splurge, be spontaneous, take that random trip; for who knows what may block you from it in the future. Use every moment of your time to grow and learn.

 

“When life becomes too complicated and we feel overwhelmed, it’s often useful just to stand back and remind ourselves of our overall purpose, our overall goal. When faced with a feeling of stagnation and confusion, it may be helpful to take an hour, an afternoon, or even several days to simply reflect on what it is that will truly bring us happiness, and then reset our priorities on the basis of that. This can put our life back in proper context, allow a fresh perspective, and enable us to see which direction to take.” 

-Dalai Lama: The Art of Happiness